Home and family

THE other day, I was asked to bless a store by the name of Homemaker. The occasion, of course, reminded me of the indispensable need to take care of, and in fact, to increasingly develop, enrich and protect our home and family life.

Our times are now fraught with elements and circumstances that tend to weaken this basic human need. We should not be indifferent to this danger. The world is becoming more and more mobile, with so much activity even in such virtual place as cyberspace. We actually now have an increased need for a healthy, stable and vibrant home and family life.

In that store blessing, the owners reassured me that the concept behind their business was to enhance family life by creating an atmosphere of beauty and intimacy with their well-chosen home decors.

Seeing that most of the items were antiques, I thought their homemaking store would also enhance healthy tradition, and respect for the past, for culture, for history, that would also nourish people’s soul.

I encouraged them to pursue their business without let-up. We cannot over-emphasize the need for the homes to really feel like homes, and not just like boarding houses or resting and eating places, or where one indulges in all forms of escapism, by feeding on one’s laziness, the tendency to waste time and engage in excessively distracting activities.

But, the business of homemaking, of course, goes beyond simply providing nice decors and creating the so-called ‘homey’ atmosphere.

Nowadays, that ‘homey’ atmosphere can somehow be artificially produced, with the real spirit behind it absent. We have to be most careful with this very tricky situation.

We should not only find time for our home and family life. We should make some kind of plan to make our respective homes and families what they ought to be. They are supposed to be the basic units of our society, the very nucleus that gives life and character to our society. How our society is is somehow determined by how our homes and families are.

More than that, our homes and families are supposed to be domestic churches where the most delicate and important task of imbuing and nurturing the life of faith, hope and charity is carried out. This is the most important dimension and purpose of the family.

I wonder if most of our homemakers–the parents and the elders—are aware of this responsibility and competent enough to fulfill it.

We always need to remember that the family is a human family, not just an animal family, and as such it has a nature that corresponds to the dignity of our human nature, that gives primary importance to the spiritual dimension which essentially distinguishes us from the other animals. Thus, our Catechism defines it as: “A man and a woman united in marriage form a family together with their children. God instituted the family and endowed it with its fundamental constitution. Marriage and the family are ordered to the good of the spouses and to the procreation and education of children.

“Members of the same family establish among themselves personal relationships and primary responsibilities. In Christ the family becomes the domestic church because it is a community of faith, of hope, and of charity.” (Compendium 456)

Since we are right in the midst of the happy Christmas season when the family plays a very crucial role in everyone’s life, let’s look again into the current challenges of this most natural, most basic and most indispensable social unit, since on it hangs much of the fate of our lives.

Definitely we cannot be blind to the many challenges and difficulties that the contemporary family faces. The number of broken and dysfunctional families is increasing. Its nature, purpose and requirements are getting vaguer and vaguer to many people, especially the young.

Many developments today, while offering some good, are also creating havoc on the family because they are not understood well nor assimilated properly to the needs of the family. There’s so much concern for the economic viability of the family at the expense of taking care of its spiritual and moral vitality which is more important.

There are many absentee parents. They often delegate their parenthood to others. Besides, parenthood is many times restricted to the act of begetting children alone, without the necessary complementing duty of bringing up children properly. Many do not know anymore what it is to be truly a parent.

But there’s always hope. As long as we do our part, we can always make our homes and families the way God wants them to be.