Holy Hour

“What does it truly mean to be joyful in hope?”, for three days and two nights, this question echoed throughout the convention.

As a delegate, I couldn’t help but ponder this question. Attending the convention with no expectations, I—a recently appointed Youth Formation Ministry head—usually prefer smaller gatherings. I prefer being with our Gagmayn’g Kristohanong Katilingban (GKK). I prefer being with the people that I already know. I like staying in my comfort zone and spend most of my ministry with the people I am comfortable with. As the program went on, another question popped out from my mind, “Why am I here, Lord?”

On our first day in Tagum, we were warmly welcomed by the parishes and our assigned foster family. A choir of children in white robes, playing banduria and violins, greeted us at Christ the King Cathedral. After the welcome program, we visited our foster family’s home, and the experience left me both amazed and grateful. Yet, the questions persisted: “What does it truly mean to be joyful in hope?” and “Why am I here, Lord?” We had our 1st plenary talk, small group activity and amazing performances from various youth groups on our first day. I can clearly remember myself being so attentive, trying to find answers. The day ended with an evening prayer and I can recall asking the same questions to the Lord.

Moving on, the second day brought learning tracks in the morning—group discussions on topics like LGBTQAI+ awareness and climate justice. I was able to attend the discussion about “Youth in the GKK and Stewardship.“ In the afternoon, we embarked on mission trips, such as visits to the city jail, home for the aged and more. Surprisingly, I was assigned to join the tree planting trip. While the first day was about listening, the second day involved active participation. After a long, tiring day, we rested before the Holy hour. I must say, it has been a long time since I first experienced the “Holy hour”.

I didn’t have the time to change my dirty clothes because of the tree planting mission trip where we were soaked up because it rained. The path in the forest where we had to plant native and bamboo trees was muddy. I felt that I was not ready to face the Lord with what I’m wearing. My pants had stains, and my shirt smelled. Despite these, we kneeled down, sung songs, and prayed during the Holy hour. It was in silence that I found the answers. Holy hour is spending an hour of prayer or meditation in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament. “Why am I here?” Maybe God doesn’t want me to be ready. He just wants me to try. Maybe the Lord is saying, it’s okay to have questions now as long as you stay with Him. He found me at the Holy hour tired, dirty, sleepy, but He was there for me. He listened to all the questions I had in my mind. “What does it truly mean to be joyful in hope?” Maybe this is it, being joyful in hope is staying with the Lord not because it is comfortable. True ministry is staying in Him despite the uncomfortable situations we are in. In moments where we find ourselves, unready, dirty, and confused, God is there. In these moments are we most invited not in loud places, but in His presence, the Blessed sacrament.

I pray for all the youth out there who are confused with themselves, afraid to try, and are scared about change. I found the answers in silence, but this does not mean I won’t have more questions coming and it is okay. God’s attentive ear is not limited to an hour. (Kristine Silvino)