A Journey towards Self-Awareness & Self-Love

In my past articles, I have shared about my coming home, finding meaning in my journey and the role of faith in this time of the pandemic. Today, I want to share something light but essential. A topic which is very close to our hearts — the Self.

We are all created in the image and likeness of God. In the story of creation, God looked at everything he had made, and he was very pleased. Scripture reminds us that He knows each of us by name and He loves us despite our imperfections. A beautiful song captures this with the lyrics, “Hindi ka kailangang magbago, kahit ito’y mas ibig ko” (Pag-Ibig Ko by Fr. Charlie Cenzon, SJ). In my life, I realized that we need to love ourselves the way our Creator loves us.

To genuinely love ourselves, we need to go through a process which I call K-U-A-L. K.U.A.L. stands for Knowing, Understanding, Accepting, and Loving.

To rightfully belong to our own selves, we ought to know our selves first. We are human beings, not robots. Thus, we ought to acknowledge our strengths and weaknesses. This is the starting point of true love. We cannot love someone we do not know. Nobody is perfect and in our imperfection, we run to God, our Creator for help.

Next is Understanding. We all have experiences in the past that have shaped us to who we are today. Understanding our self means being at peace with our past, and realizing that everything happens not by accident. Indeed, it is true that “what won’t kill us will make us stronger.” Our childhood experiences and certain unresolved issues in our families of origin can sometimes be hindrances to our intra-personal growth.

Acceptance is a long and tedious process. Yet we need to accept who we are in order to fully see the God who dwells in us. We can only learn to accept others if and when we have fully accepted ourselves.

Finally, after going through the process of knowing, understanding and accepting ourselves, we can love our authentic self — the way God sees and loves us. As the song goes, “learning to love yourself is the greatest love of all.”

During my 6-year stay in the seminary, I was blessed to be introduced to concepts like self-awareness and discovery leading to self-improvement and empowerment. Knowing one’s self is the key to understanding and wisdom.

When we learn to love ourselves just as God unconditionally loves us, then we can genuinely be persons for others. The Word of God tells us “to love our neighbors as we love ourselves.”

“Kung minsan, sa kagustuhan nating maging pinakamagaling, nakakalimutan nating maging mabuti.”