Letting Go

Recently my eldest daughter attended their school’s senior’s ball and I just realized that my baby is now a sweet, pretty 18-year-old lady. Prior to the ball I accompanied her in search for the perfect gown. I can say that she has grown up for my likes were not her taste of a beautiful dress and she can decide on some matters by herself with a little guidance from me.

Indeed, after days of mall hopping, we found her dress and gladly agreed about the style. And off she went to the ball, all made up and styled. As I sent her off I felt nostalgic and reminisced about the past and how time flies. Before, this lady held my hands and won’t let go and was afraid of what the world offers. As she blossomed into a young adult, she is now confident of taking care of herself.

Soon my daughter will be a first year college student already. She will be facing some challenges along the way and hopefully amidst it she will have a college degree after four years. My role as a mother is to support her in every area of her life. Letting go of her to venture on new avenues in life won’t be easy. Through the Lord’s grace I hope and pray that she would eventually live a beautiful, happy and contented life.

On another note, it is important when our children turn into a young adult that we should instill in them the value of self-reliance so that it would be easy for us to let them go. According to Linda and Richard Eyre in their book “Teaching Your Children Values”, self-reliance is “accepting the responsibility for and the consequences of one’s own actions and performance, rather than blaming luck or circumstances or someone else.” Furthermore, the Eyre’s said that self-reliance is “a powerful value. Those who have it help others by accepting responsibility and doing their best in the world. Those who don’t have it hurt others by blaming them and failing to develop the gifts and talents that could serve or enlighten or benefit other people. Thus, the value of self-reliance is about trying to know ourselves, to do our best and to accept the consequences both of who we are and of what we can do.”

May the above value help build our children’s self-respect and self-confidence. As for us parents taking good care of our children are our top priority. But there would come a time that we have to take a backseat and watch them grow on their own so that they will learn to take care of themselves most especially if they are already in the right age. All we can do is to be there for them if they need us for support and affection.

“Being a good parent requires knowing when to push and when to back off, when to help and when to let them make mistakes and then being strong enough to watch them go.”