Dialogue of Presence

Communication and dialogue are two words that can be understood in many ways. In this reflection they are restricted or focused to the idea of missionary presence on the part of bishops and priests.

Here I wish to share what I have learned about communication and dialogue from having been a priest for 57 years 43 of which as a bishop.

Briefly, the first essential requirement of a priest or bishop who wishes to be a man of dialogue in mission and an effective communicator is Presence. This does not refer to a physical location, that is, to be beside, near, or close, to another person. Wherever you are situated in a gathering — big or small — your presence should be an Interested Presence. In other words, you like to be there. Your interest will be noticeable in your behavior towards the place and towards others.

Of course, smile is easily understood as interest. But not all the time. There can be a smile that hides suspicion, mistrust, prejudice and cunning. Sooner or later it will be noticed.

Interested Presence necessarily brings with it sincere respect. Respectful presence will bring with it respectful, sincere and interested gestures, motions, and words. This is what I call quality presence, a powerful factor in communication. This normally and easily lead to friendship, human friendship, that is, which is the bottom line of dialogue.

When I was assigned by Pope St. John Paul II as apostolic administrator of the Prelature of Marawi from 1987 to 1991 after the death of Bishop Bienvenido S. Tudtud our being in that Islamic City was communicated and lived out as Dialogue of Presence in the dialogue of life with Muslims.

One beautiful effect of this kind of presence is an invitation by Matingka, a young Maranao Muslim girl, to be her Ama Datu, her father, at her wedding to a young Muslim lad. Her father had died days before. From then on I was considered a member of her family. I was the only Christian in the hundred percent Maranao Muslim barangay Sugod within Marawi City.

The Maranao wedding ceremony is a topic worth narrating at the proper time.