iFeel

“Father, I been praying like you suggested,” the engineering student explained.

“So how is it going?” Father Julian asked.

“I was excited, because I’ve never explored meditative prayer before!” He replied.

“And how are you doing now?”

“Frankly, it’s becoming tougher every day,” the student confessed.

“In what way?” Father Julian leaned over to set his cell phone in silent mode.

“Truth to tell, rather boring,” Patrick said.

“Did you at least prepare for it like I said?”

“Yes, Father. As regards TTP (Time, Topic and Place), I have always stuck to them,” Patrick showed some satisfaction for accomplishing these requirements.

“What exactly do you mean by being bored, Patrick?” Father Julian asked.

“At first, I felt great starting out something new. But afterwards, I don’t seem to feel anything satisfactory or consoling during meditation. I usually end up just being conscious about the time and when it will be over.”

“So you’re actually saying that your boredom is caused by the lack of feeling or satisfaction?”

“Yes! I’m fully aware, like you said, that praying should not depend on feelings. But don’t’ we at least merit some assurance or consolation in order to look forward to it more?” Patrick said.

“Man is naturally inclined to experience reassuring feelings. After all, it is another form of sensing that we are enjoying what we are doing. But since our feelings are not objectively stable, that is, they fluctuate depending on our physical-psychological-emotional states, then they are a poor basis for doing things. There is nothing wrong to desire them, but we cannot allow our emotional states to dictate upon duties and obligations.”

“So what do you suggest I do, Father?”

“It just occurred to me now: feel the others’ feelings,” Father Julian excitedly said.

“Feel the others’ feelings?” Patrick asked.

“By faith pray to Someone. Although the conversation may seem one-way, a dry monologue and unfruitful. We cannot deny that there is still someone on the other side,” Father Julian briefly checked his phone for any urgent texts.

“Clear so far,” Patrick replied.

“It is more like accompanying a sick loved one in the hospital. Given his condition, he cannot talk or move. Despite this apparent one-way relationship, you don’t tell yourself that you’re bored and won’t go on taking care of him because he cannot speak or move.”

“That’s very true!” Patrick agreed. “It’s like staying before Jesus in the chapel. He doesn’t say anything or move.”

“Thus, it would be more appropriate to think that even though there seems no response from the other side, we can be sure that that person feels grateful for our presence.”

“So when I pray, instead of thinking of what I feel or wanting to feel, I should rather consider how the person I’m addressing feels.”

“Correct!”

“In this way, we also avoid being ‘selfish’ about just getting something for ourselves in prayer. Instead, we strive to feel how God is delighted with our persevering faith, hope and love. How our Lady, St. Joseph, the saints and our guardian angels must be consoled with our prayers and so on.”

“And we cannot doubt that they are all filled with joy when they see our persevering prayer, because it demonstrates how bent we are on our direction towards Heaven,” Father Julian concluded.