My Journey to Widowhood (Part 6 of 8)

Remembering the faithful departed
There are moments when memories of him flooded my mind. I keep telling myself as I tell others that the best way to show our love to the one who passed away is to remember the good deeds he has done but above all, to do or follow the qualities which endeared him to us.

For the common traits, we have together, this was easy. What I find more useful and which needs awareness are his good traits which I practice. These are what I am more grateful with.

I thank the Lord for having given them to me, truly a gift for all eternity. A few days ago, I mentioned his birthday as I was preparing for the subdivision/GKK fiesta. My faithful housekeeping companion commented on my thoughtfulness to my husband’s birthday which I celebrated together with the fiesta celebration. That’s how relevant he is in the affairs of the home.

First year of bereavement
The first year of bereavement is the most delicate and dangerous part especially for the widows and widowers.

This is when the absence of the loved one is felt and the longer the absence the more painful the feeling becomes. The normal tendency is to find a substitute for the loved one.

This is the most vulnerable period. Hence, every time I get a chance to speak to a widow or widower, I would warn them of this pitfall so that they would not be surprised if sweeping emotions would come and they are ready not to be swept by those emotions.

Economic Factor
If the husband dies ahead and the wife is working, the chance of economic survival is high because the wife can support the family.

On the other hand, if the wife is totally dependent on the husband. This economic dependence could be the most significant factor for the wife to be open for another partner. (To be continued) (Ma. Iris Melliza)